Technical Recruiter

7 December 2019

This is why programmers hate technical recruiters. Q: “Do you even know anything about programming?” A: “Did I mention stock options?”

Cast

Sagar Bhatt
Sagar
Greg Stone
Harvey Smellhorse

Transcript

>> Hello.
>> Hey, is this Zodor?
>> That’s pronounced Sagar.
>> Great, this is Harvey Smellhorse.
>> I’m calling from Smile and Dial Recruiting.
>> I’ve got some new clients.
>> They just closed on VC funding and
>> they are looking to hire some rock stars.
>> So you saw my GitHub profile?
>> GitHub, of course, I saw GitHub, I love GitHub.
>> All right, well first off, you should know I hate recruiters and
>> I’ll only work in New York City.
>> Great, I’ve got an opening right outside of New York, Pittsburgh.
>> You’re going to love it there, Babar.
>> It’s Sagar, and I’ll need 120k salary, minimum.
>> Minimum, perfect.
>> That’s what we’re doing, minimum wage.
>> And you should know I’ll only work as a Ruby programmer.
>> It’s a sysadmin, a sysadmin job.
>> That’s almost the same thing, Babar.
>> It’s Sagar, and, no, it’s not.
>> Do you even know anything about programming?
>> Did I mention stock options?
>> We got stock options.
>> These guys are definitely going IPO.
>> This is why programmers hate technical recruiters like you,
>> because you know nothing about technology.
>> And all you do is spam my inbox incessantly.
>> You’d have better luck selling fake Viagra.
>> So maybe go do that!
>> Actually, since you mentioned it,
>> I’ve got a great deal on some male enhancement pumps from Indonesia.
>> These babies are going to blow your genitals away.
>> Seriously?
>> Yeah.
>> Zabar, I don’t joke about things like this.

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