Worst TED Talk Ever

4 September 2013

It’s a different kind of TED Talk. Too different. At least it ends with a bang, though.

Transcript

[MUSIC]
>> Guys get your medicine out cuz you’re about
>> to get a little bit of Cat Scratch Fever.

>> Or maybe you just like to say and this is Nightline.

>> Maybe at the end of the night you just want to go.
>> Where everyone knows your name.
>> Hey, Steve uh, TED Talk is not just just about people named Ted.
>> Uh, Matt, I only have 18 minutes here so if you
>> could keep your questions to yourself
>> that would be much appreciated because by
>> the end of this presentation you’re gonna be so pumped up you’re
>> gonna wanna drive your car off a bridge with your secretary in tow.
>> This guy, knows what I’m talking about!
>> Yes!
>> You’re gonna wanna walk softly and carry a big stick like this guy.
>> And also like this guy, although his stick isn’t as
>> big, it’s like a little stirring stick for his honey pot.
>> Yeah, you’re missing the point.
>> Yeah, I guess it’s kinda turned more into a Teddy talk at this point.
>> But, you know, when you’re in charge it’s all about
>> bending the rules so you can break them and make them.
>> Wait, I thought TED Talks were supposed to be about how we’re not happy.
>> Are you, are you a little lost Sarah?
>> You know what I do when I get lost?

>> I talk to my founder.
>> The founder of CNN!
>> Okay, this is ridiculous.
>> Ridic, ridiculous?
>> I’ll be the judge of that.
>> Or should I say the Judge Smails of that?
>> Ted Knight from Caddyshack, Spaulding get your foot off the boat!
[LAUGH].
>> Yeah, I’m out of here.
>> Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
>> Where are you going man?
>> Hey, hey.
>> Where’s the love Matt?
>> Where’s the Love Boat?
>> Ted Lange, the bartender from Love Boat, gotta love it.
>> It’s really hard to find Ted’s out there, you know?
>> There’s, I mean, there’s this guy.
>> But you don’t wanna get on his bad side.
[SOUND].

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