Honest Business Card Exchange

Let’s be honest, this is what REALLY happens when you give someone your business card.

So basically I'm just gonna mindlessly babble to you
about uh, random sports teams in the local area until
we get to a point, I don't know, like
around here, where I can say hey, great meeting man.
And just so you have it, here's my business card.
>> Oh great.
>> Enjoy that.
>> Well I will definitely be throwing this
away the moment we're not in each others' sight.
>> Oh yeah, you got to.
>> Yeah.
Well let me just give you a
meaningless compliment on it so you'll feel better.
Uh, that's a nice font.
>> Oh, wow, thanks, man.
I, I don't know what a font is, but uh, thank you so much.
I appreciate that.
>> You realize, of course, we set up this meeting
via email, proving we already know how to contact each other.
>> Right, right.
But you have to understand that that uh, piece of paper has my name
printed on it, so it kinda validates my ego just by handing it to you.
>> No, I understand perfectly well.
You're a meaningless cog and this makes you feel important.
>> That's right.
That's right.
But, I mean the thing is, I'm kind of
secretly hoping that you'll be impressed by my title.
>> Oh is it something stupid
like Thought Leader or Chief Happiness Officer?
>> No, it's ah, it's worse than that, you
are currently speaking to the Director of First Impressions.
>> Wow.
>> Hi.
>> That is, awful.
>> Well, it's pretty bad.
But I, I, I actually, the reason why I need like a meaningless big title is
that uh, it covers up for the fact
that uh, I don't really do anything around here.
>> Oh, I understand.
Well, then, it's good to know that
you're wasting trees for no reason whatsoever.
Maybe, next time, I'm here you could
put some car wash flyers in my windshield.
>> Uh, I'm really, I'm too lazy for that.
But uh, as you'll notice there's lots of
old fashioned ways that you can contact me.
>> There sure are.
I'm glad I have your fax number.
I'm a big faxer.
They call me Mr. Fax at my office.
>> Ah, Mr. Fax, that's nice.
>> Well I appreciate you giving me a piece of garbage to throw away and,
oh look here's an empty soda can so now you have something to throw away.
We're even.
>> Ah, great.
Well thanks so much.
I guess uh, I'll be contacting you and if i don't hear
from you I will just contact you again, and again, and again.
Until I finally get the message that you don't want to do business with me.
>> Great.
That sounds about right.
I still have no idea what you do by the way.
>> Me neither man.
I look forward to hearing from you.
>> Yeah, you won't.
>> I know.
Hey, sports right.
>> Sports, I love sports.
>> Weather.
[MUSIC].
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