Software Development Myths
I don't write code.
I develop software.
If they sound like the same thing to you,
One's like a five year old drawing stick
figures with crayon.
The other one's Rembrandt.
Do you see any crayons around here?
I don't think so.
Programming is thinking.
It's, it's not just typing.
It's why we spend most of the day
just sleeping, wondering around, looking
out the window.
It doesn't seem like we're doing a lot
but, but trust me the gears are turning.
>> My workstation I have about six
going like right now I have online poker.
Moto, Hacker news, World of Warcraft,
there's a video surveillance
set up of the lobby of the building and
>> So you you got those cats, those cute
>> The kitten the kittens they, they fall
asleep they're so adorable.
>> Some of them wear suits.
>> Before I work with any programmer, I
ask them the chicken question.
Which is, had your way, how would you
design a chicken and why.
And of course the right answer is why do
we need to design chickens?
Didn't, didn't God already kinda design
chickens for everybody?
And that shows you can think critically.
What the hell was, did you actually design
I'm obsessed with efficiency.
That's why I'm always asking, why can't we
do things faster?
Why is this taking three meetings instead
Why am I still sitting here talking to
How many questions am I gonna keeping
And where's my Adderall?
Look, I don't care how many years of
programming experience you have.
When I'm looking at a programmer, it's
about the intangibles.
Zach, I want you to write me a
program that spits out the numbers one
Any multiple of three, it should say fizz
instead of the number.
Multiple of five, it should say buzz.
If it's three and five, it should say fizz
Can you do it?
>> No idea how to do it.
>> How many light sabers do you own?
>> You're god damn hired.
Dude, I'm busy.
>> [INAUDIBLE] your saber.
>> Work on that encrypting thing.
>> Okay, sure, sure.
I'll do my thing, you do yours.
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